My heart literally hurts because I am feeling very alone. Tim is on his flight back to the states and it sucks. I didn't realise that I have become so dependent on him and our nightly talks. I don't want to call mommy and complain to her - I have grown up and am beyond that stage of life. I am trying to rely on God. I know that He is with me and that He is always always looking out for me and my heart. I need to remember that.
Having exams right now don't help either. I am stressed and disappointed in myself. I thought I'll be smarter; I know I could do better if I were in another school, in another program. Specifically one that is taught in English. I loved high school; I loved psychology and learning about things like that. I loved the interaction that western schools give you and I yearn for it. Lord, why is it that I am here? I detest this kind of learning. I want to be more hands on. I want to feel like I'm making progress. Help me oh Lord, to find peace and calmness within all the chaos of my emotions.
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